The light at the end of the tunnel.

  

   The light at the end of the tunnel painted by our cousin Sally Cooper

This morning I spent some time looking through my photos on a mission to find evidence of when exactly in my life, that things were worse than they are now.  These are scary times and here in the UK bound to get worse before they get better. The idea being that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel has been in question because for many people there was no light, no beacon to aim at and they have lost there struggle against this cruel virus. Well that is the hope anyway. I was reminded of this expression by our cousin Sally Cooper who lives fairly close to us and is a Facebook friend as well as family. Sally is also a talented artist and has an exhibition coming up soon after we do actually get to the end of the flipping great tunnel.

The first one I found was this holiday photo taken maybe forty years ago. We were on holiday staying at the Hotel Central in Sölden, in Austria. We had been summer glacier skiing, hiking and eating too much. The hotel is in a marvellous position to cater for any of those. On the ‘what to do board’ in the reception area was a photo offering a day trip to sample White Water Rafting, there was a photo similar to this one here, pinned on the board. Neither of us had ever done anything like that before. It looked like fun and a bit of an adventure, something different.

As we read all about what the day entailed, we chatted about it and asked questions, to see if it was alright for novices and were told that there would be an instruction talk before hand at that there would be an instructor in charge on the raft. We were told that the tour guide from the hotel would also be on board and that he had been several times and loved it. So we paid our money and had an early breakfast before going to the bus to be taken to the rafting outfit on the River Inn about 45 minutes away from Sölden.

When we arrived we were and given a good talk that was deadly serious about the experience were about to enjoy and told that we must obey any instructions given by the guy in charge. This was vital, no time for questions once we had set off, although we would have a few practices in calm water before we got to the rough water, to whip us into shape. Then we were led to a shed where we were all fitted out with life jackets that were handed out by a young man who had a nasty swollen cut on his face with stitches securing it.

We were asked to sign a disclaimer. Steve and I looked at each other for a moment and then decided that the whole thing must be safe or they wouldn’t take beginners. It seemed like a lot of fun at first and we quickly got the hang of the paddling in time with the instructor’s orders then he asked for a volunteer to do a fun game to get us relaxed. Of course Steve put his hand up!

He was told to stand on the bench seat between the only other lady and me behind the four men in front of us, then jump from there to the next seat and the next seat and then jump in the water. He did that and we were all laughing. After being hauled in again, he did it again. All happy holiday makers. Two women, four men, plus instructor.

You can’t see Steve in this photo, he is hidden by the man in the front wearing green who was the hotel tour guide, I think his name was Norbert. You can only see my head just behind the Italian man who looks terrified in this shot, he was with the lady with dark hair.

When that was done with, we could hear the noise coming from the rapids ahead. It got louder and the instructor changed to a more serious tone of voice and soon we were doing exactly what he shouted at us as we slipped into the white water that seemed endless but we were working well as a team paddling to the shouts that were hard to hear over the thunder of the water. I couldn’t see anything but white water.

Suddenly there was hard thud, that when right through my body and I was catapulted out of the raft hitting the water hard and being sucked under the surface where I went round and round like a towel in a washing machine. I tried to remain calm as I was thrown around. I was twisting to try to see the surface but I was caught in a whirlpool effect and it all looked the same. I remember it as though it were yesterday. It all seemed to be happening in slow motion and I was sure that I would drown and yet not panicking. I tried my hardest to reach the surface but expecting the lights to go out, I was sure it was the end of me. Only a matter of time.

The suddenly I popped up to the surface and tried to get my legs in front of me to prevent being bashing by the rocks as we had been told in the talk and the practice on the water. I couldn’t see anything but roiling water. Then suddenly I heard a shout and twisted round to see another raft with a man standing up with a life belt. He threw it at me and I managed to grab hold of it. The guy was shouting at me in German and I was pulled toward the craft that he was on, there were several groups of six plus one, all from different hotels.

I was hauled into the boat to see the instructor, who was the rudder man on our boat. It was not until we got to the place where we stopped that Steve came rushing over and grabbed me. He had also been thrown out and had looked for me all around but could see nothing. He told me he had thought that I was dead. He said there was no way I could be under the water that long and not drown. I didn’t have any major injuries but I was bleeding here and there though nothing was life threatening. I had put one of my teeth through the flesh just below my bottom lip and had a few other cuts and grazes but I could stand and to my surprise too, I was alive.

I slept like rock that night but felt quite shaky the next day and didn’t look too good with a black eye and a swollen bottom lip. It is quite shocking to realise how close you have been to death and I was shaken up and felt quite weak even thinking about it.

So having to stay indoors isolated like prisoners in our own home is not such a big deal to me.

My husband Steve and I are keeping ourselves very busy doing mountains of exercise. In fact we are engaging in some level of exercise all morning long and then trying to occupy our minds in other ways, doing long neglected jobs and making contact with friends by email. I had an exchange of news with my friend Helen Silver who lives immediately opposite our home. I was shouting from our upstairs front window and she was outside her house in her driveway. We will get through this. We will keep calm and carry to the light at the end of the tunnel.